No one said life would be easy. Marriage can be very blissful but it is a two way street. After 14 years of questions of why did I get married and did I do it for the right reasons? Many years of unhappiness and dealing with all the moves and changes not only for myself but our children as well. I made the decision after some serious thought that my marriage was over a few years ago and I needed to just do what needed to be done to officially end it.
During this process I did meet someone who I have so much in common with and we became very good friends. Once I made the announcement that I wanted a divorce this friend and I started pursuing things from a different level. Not only was this hard for the two of us but I also needed to have the acceptance from my children. I have said many prayers and realized that I was at fault also. I was tired of making all the changes and starting over time after time without even being thought of. Am I asking to much to be considered important and not thought of as money.
Yes, my children were very upset and they still go through the emotions of us not being together but they also have accepted that we are both much happier (at least I am). I am trying to be the nice person and just get out but as time passes I realize that isn't so easy and many times I want to rethink my decisions. I have just as much invested as he does and its very unfortunate that he makes more money than me but he is a man.
Yes I have day where I am very angry but I realize that it isn't worth being a cry babe over it. I just need to be happy and take care of my children. The best way to do that is living a life where happiness is seen and the love us abundant. We will also have God in our lives and if he can forgive me than that means I can forgive myself.
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2 comments:
You know in your heart you made the right decision and your kids will be much better people for it! I know its hard right now and when everything seems to calm down its just because another storm is brewing!! I am proud of you for your inner strength :)You deserve the happiness with your man and nothing less!
thanks for the word of encouragement. I am taking it day by day and I knew this wasn't going to go over well but to be treated as if I am a bad mother and person was enough. He finally realized I wasn't playing when I explained reasons for my actions and also accepted that I could have possibly done things differently but it is what it is and the marriage was over.
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